The break-in last
April at Plymouth Clams Unlimited has now boiled over into a full
fledged disaster for 
the
town. The research center was blown up last week in what police termed
as an act of revenge. Police now
believe the notorious Gifford
gang of River Pirates mistakenly broke into Clams Unlimited instead
of the fertility clinic next door, which resulted in Clumans being
discovered there within days. Detectives are certain that this publicity
enraged
the gang and led them to place the thermite charges which leveled
the facility, apparently seeking to avoid being implicated
as the disgusting perpetrators of the original crime, too sickening
to be printed in a fami
ly news outlet. The result was catastrophic
and no Clumans survived. Millions of legitimate clam seedlings also
perished. Fortunately the fertility
clinic
was spared
any
damage.
As with many stories
of horror, it doesn't end there. Somehow, news travels quickly, even
in the ocean's depths. Perhaps a seagull told a seal and the seal
told a mermaid and, well, you get the picture. In any case the news
soon reached the great depths of the Atlantic sea floor and was recited
from clam to clam until even the great giant sea clams of the Caribbean
learned of the monstrous act.
The huge bivalves
became incensed and began a slow migration to the continental shelf, finally arriving undetected under the surface of Plymouth Harbor.
There they gathered forces and waited until the Sun descended 
below
the western horizon. It was then time to make their move. In the wee hours
of the morning they surfaced near Plymouth Rock and came ashore,
wisely using the boat ramp when no old geezers were nearbye. Then
the real horrors began! The clams attacked any living creature they
came across. When no movement was detected on the streets, they broke
down doors and devoured the inhabitants. Screams were heard throughout the town as escape routes were cut off.
Some lucky owners of two story houses hid upstairs and were spared.
After several hours satisfying their bloodlust, the clams returnd
to the sea and disappeared beneath the waves, fully sated by human flesh.
The clams' misplaced
anger accomplished nothing. The entire River Pirate Gang was spotted
cavorting in Ernies after the attack. Some say they were eating fried
clams.
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