The Oval Office
(Union of Socialist American Republics)
Anointed One: Well, Rahm, tonight's the big prime time news conference.
Rahm:: Yes, Comrade President, a chance to make our case for the glorious future of the motherland.
Anointed One: Just make sure there are no teleprompter malfunctions. I love my prompter.
Rahm ::Of course, Comrade President. You will be magnificent.
Anointed One: But everything is coming apart! What can I say to turn things around? How can I explain the unemployment increases and the failure of the stimulus package?
Rahm ::Deny, deny, deny.
Anointed One: Come again?
Rahm ::Just tell them we rescued the economy from a recession and everything is peachy.
Anointed One: Won't they all see through that?
Rahm ::The press adores you. They'll print every word verbatim.
Anointed One: OK, but what about that health care package? Especially page 14, where it says you cannot get private health coverage. They'll say I lied about that.
Rahm : Blame Pelosi.
Anointed One: But I told her that's what I wanted!
Rahm:: Deny, deny, deny.
Anointed One: Yes, she can take the hit. Those wingnuts in San Francisco won't care. What about when they ask about cap and trade? We're losing ground there.
Rahm:: Blame Hillary.
Anointed One: How? What's she got to do with it?
Rahm:: India and China rejected the global warming initiative and she's Secretary of State. She went to India and failed. You didn't go to India.
Anointed One: You know, Rahm, you're a clever fellow. You could have been anything you wanted to be.
Rahm :: Oh, I'm just here to serve, Comrade President, just here to serve.
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Last modified: July 22, 2009